My wife all of the sudden got markedly better at giving blow jobs. Should I be happy or concerned?
we couldnt find her phone in the morning so i called it and found it under the bed. my name came up as 'regret'
All I remember is saying that "fire will make it all better"
Hurry up. Some creepy guy with a "God is vengeful" flyer is asking where I wanna go most today. I think he's going to chop me into pieces.
Dude, you disappeared somewhere on the walk back and shortly after we got a call from your cell phone from this guy explaining that him and his roommates woke up to the smell of burning pizza and a naked stranger on their couch.
You don't seem to appreciate the rareness of his junk.
Send me a picture. I'm more of a visual learner.
It's like god touched my soul and said 'you will be great in bed'
Omg I'm puking right now and then sneezed four times in a row. You don't know pain til this happens to you.
So high I started thinking my desktop picture of a cat was too erotic for the workplace.
Thank you <3 he just looked at me, fist bumped me, and asked me what was on my titty....we may cut her off
I didn't know White Castle was open when your sober.
She gave me a job then fed me cheesecake in bed. She's a keeper!
Btw I definitely had pizza sauce on my face, a painful hickey on my neck, and I just remember screaming SISTER WIVES because of the girl's 1997 jean skirt! Wow.
So I remember having an orgasm, but I didn't wake up next to anyone. Your dog is afraid of me. Is this a sick joke?
Any chance he has an open marriage? That penis shouldn’t be wasted on one woman. It should be shared with all womankind, or at least me. I’m too good at sex to be deprived a penis that large
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