just sold my soul for a pack of cigaroos. little do they know they got the short end of the deal. suckers.
he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
I spent all night sexting your girlfriend for you because you were too drunk. You're welcome.
Were not really friends so much as I suck his dick a lot
Dude, she looked like the Canadian Slam Poet, neck hair and all.
I was just counting ceiling tiles when he ate me out, it was that bad.
And with me just getting pulled over and you maxing your card out on tennis balls I don't know if we can afford it
Two girls just making out in the elevator. Didn't stop when the doors opened. Part of me didnt mind, but part did. Bc I wanted to get on the elevator without it getting awkward. Am I gay?
50% drunk capacity currently
I am having the most awesome nonsexual conversation about my vagina right now
man my uterus needs to drop the egg or GTFO, BUUUSHIT
"Nobody needs to know that I have a vibrating butt plug and nobody needs to know that I'm probably gonna start wearing it at work"
Nothing says hey I wanna be your friend again like ambushing me with a dick pic
Is it bad I use my AA meeting to hookup with guys?
I’m torn. She’s crazy - like legitimately “Wear your skin as a suit” crazy. But her blow jobs and dirty talk are Pornhub quality!
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