Where is the hickey?
I don't think you'd be able to understand Inception if you weren't high...
She says she'll teach me how to make her squirt tonight so yea, I'm bailing again. I'm not sayin sorry since you don't have a better offer.
I'm spooning a three legged dog right now. Started drinking whiskey with Breakfast. Best part about being biracial is Irish cousins. Dog Pic Attahed
Chasing tequila with honey. Ill let you know how it turns out.
I will now refer to my life as before and after I used Astroglide for the first time
At what point did you think the cops were actually coming to hang out with us
You cant hold me accountable for my actions when im high.
Just threw up in the waiting room. I can't believe I have to switch dermatologists again.
No idea how he made them, but vodka water balloons were a horrible idea.
We're about to go to a party titled 'Night of 1000 Jello Shots".
I'm eating the rest of the Xmas shrooms and welcoming 2012 by communing with the pine cone.
The only responsible thing ive done in vegas is shower and that was onky to clean vomit off me
I guess I'm open to more types of dick now
I have to pee in a cup in the morning and they are going to say....you just peed a miller light. I'm going to hang my head in shame and say yes...yes I did.
So please don't worry, but I need some help getting blood out of my drywall so I can get my security deposit back. I would not ask if the need was not great.
Randomize
