32 messages asking me to suck his dick. And there for a minute i thought i was desperate. ha!
Hahahaha
make that 40.
too bad you can't see the clap by looking at her face.
she is a standing ovation.
I'm bringing in a picture of a stranger on facebook to get my haircut. I have reached a new level of creepy.
Hey fuck you and your taint. I'm just riding a canoe called life, back the fuck off. P.s. I need a ride
Definitely Got caught hugging a strangers tree last night with 5 others.
Well. It was around 3 or 4 in the morning. He ran into the woods. Wearing moccasins. Holding an extension cord. He was trying to catch a deer. That about sums up the awesomeness of the night.
I love it. Like, more than my penis at the moment.
He said you stopped mid-fuck, called fives on his dick, walked out to grab another drink, and came back.
I am the slutty bisexual glue that holds this friendship group together.
So if I tell her fire is hot and it will burn her... she's probably just going to keep throwing her vagina at it huh?
I haven't had a normal poop since halloween, we are not mixing vodka and tequila ever again
RESPECT THE VODQUILA
But the drunk streaking fizzled when one of jake's friends took a piss while running with a massive erection.
Take off your clothes and see if he wants to have sex, that's a good way to find out
it's like my ID runs away from me when it knows it's time for me to drink
Do you think it would be okay if i cleaned my cartilage piercing with the leftover vodka?
Randomize
