did u really fuck my little sister???
im not saying yes or no but just know that my answer rhymes with "mess"
You coming out tonight? We gotta hang out before I move to Madison. BTW I'm moving to Madison.
the trail of clothing leading from the bed to the door was in the exact order i needed to put them on. underwear near the bed shoes by the door.
I need to find more Xanax, my Grandpa doesent leave for another week and he's made it a mission to get me to come out of the closet as a xmas gift to my parents.
Step one go to argentina step two fuck bitches it's a simple plan really
How does one chug a beer and swing the bottle at someone in a single motion? This guys a beer ninja man
we broke up because he couldn't handle the fact that i've slept with more girls than he has. also, i've slept with the girl he's seeing now.
Somehow he made it really romantic
He came on your tits... That doesn't scream romance to me.
Just realized I could have five different dicks in me the day of valentines day but no real date. My life
He just stopped in the middle of undressing for sex to dip his slice of pizza in ranch. I think I’m in love.
Lol, maybe a little bit. I don't know. I don't keep a super keen memory log of dicks honestly.
Why is there bacon in the couch?
dude it was our first time and her hair caught on fire from the candles on the nightstand
There is no way that actually happened!
the smell of burnt hair covered up the sweaty sex smell.
When we started the night I was in zebra wedges & she was in my black boots... I woke up wearing pink flip flops & the mirror on my rental is fuxked up. Wtf happened last night?
I’ve slept with a Senior, a Freshman and a Junior so far. I’m a Sophomore away from hitting for the cycle
Randomize
