My life would be so much easier if i could just ride around in the cash cab all day
i just won an entire level on word mole with the word 'clitoris'
what about "I will fuck you for a jamba juice" do you not understand?
i just sent my parents are gone come over I have condoms to my mom because Derek changed my numbers while I was passed out
i was considerably less excited after they told me my present didnt have a penis
Get everyone out of their dorms and watch 3 girls do the walk of shame from my room.
Well, I can't relate. I have no idea what it feels like to withhold sex. Or have self-control in general.
I am 100% positive that I have seen a porno that was shot in this bar.
It's like my butt was the only innocence I had left and now I don't even have that.
Omg. Some dude is jacking off in Kelly's bathroom.
I told the cop to try walking in heels and he'd understand why I was walking home without then on. He told me he only does that on Wednesdays.
How weird would it be to ask your bro to 3d print your dick for me
listen I will take literally anything I can get my tiny gay fingers on
He called out my ex's name during sex.
Alex is a pretty common unisex name.
It was the same Alex. I asked.
If work found out I was using THEIR paper to write Karate Kid fanfic I'd never hear the end of it.
Randomize
