If you borrow your friends real doll, should you wear a condom?
I was thinking about him in the shower then i get out of the shower and there was a text from him
its like he has a camera inside of my shower that looks into my brain
Can you send me a pic of you vag, I'm sexting the guy and he wants a pic but I didnt shave
dude are you serious?
I know you already have a pic on your phone
Dude I'm telling you, conditioner is the best for jerking it in the shower. It feels great and afterwards everything is all smooth
she then came into the room and yelled I'M GOING TO BE A COCK BLOCK for 5 minutes
He spent most of his night trying to convince people that he had changed and was no longer a sleazebag...he had his nut hanging out of his pants about an hour later.
My night consisted of weed, sex, and Mexican food. In that order. I think we found the keys to saving our marriage.
I'm just going to say , cocktail races are not for a Wednesday night maybe not even a Friday type of deal
Haha yeah this costume is worse than I imagined. I look more like a gothic hooker who caters specifically to creepy men with doll fetishes
Im rolling face in a pizzeria. I want to be with people who love me.
I did something similar high once. I stopped like 30 feet in front of a stop sign because I felt like it was running towards me and I started crying. Got out my car and hugged it and told it not to run away people need it.
I plan on drinking enough to kill at least 2 frat boys and make an aa meeting weep for joy
why is there a chinchilla in our apartment, and where did it come from?
question nothing. DON'T QUESTION A FREE CHINCHILLA.
I FUCKED WHEELCHAIR DUDE
HE'S INTO WEIRD SHIT
GOOD KIND OF WEIRD SHIT
I just baptized you in budweriser and you were cool with it
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