Well we ran into the cornfields when the cops got there. We'd been hiding in there for 45 mins when he asks me "So this wasn't exactly how I'd planned this but I thought I'd ask. How do you feel about oral sex?"
Remember when we were trying to guess how many people could fit in my shower? The answer is 7
He slapped my ass and hummed the jello theme song, which was followed by an overly loud "IT'S ALIVE!"
Why the fuck is BBQ sauce coming out of my shower head?
We are going out Saturday. Oh and we might also be jousting on bikes.
they pretty much knew i was there to get drunk and fuck their daughter
If someone would have told me in preschool that I was going to do him I would have said no
There are 3 guys sitting in the elevator in lawn chairs wearing sunglasses and holding beers. the hallway rugs are stuffed in a trash can. i've never been so glad to be sober.
I called for backup and had two guys carry him to the shower. The bigger guy offered to wash his hair.
i'm scootering my little heart out so i'm not late for a weed pickup. this is the meaning of adolescence
Lets play hurricane shelter. And the shelter is my bed, and we forgot our clothes.
She sent me nudes via email. What the fuck are we still in the 90s? Grow up
i know it looks like there's pee in the mayo jar in the fridge but i promise it's just apple juice that wouldn't fit in the jug after i added the booze.
It's like if you wanna bond just do a ropes course or have group sex you don't have to be weird about it
whatever. i don't need to be drunk to tell you i'd suck your dick if you had one.
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