I just found out me and my parents buy from the same drug dealer.
you should get a family discount.
there was this guy running across campus barefoot in the pouring rain stepping in all the puddles. i want his life. and i want to be stripper.
You'd be surprised at how many crooked penises are out there
Also, I am ligit concerned that I might compulsively start collecting vibrators like Pokemon.
You face planted into a car door. And somehow didn't drop your burrito.
It feels like New Years Day all over again...me trying desperately not to throw up in the backseat & mom and dad blissfully unaware in the front
He told me my outfit made me look like a twelve year old then proceeded with "but you don't look like a whore"
I just want to emotionally destroy him but also find out how big his dick is so this is perfect
In 2014 only three boys have seen my boobs so far
Did we do drunk science last night? There's tequila in the test tubes...
Bottom line; if I'm coming out of my bat cave to do the dishes and get a chicken wing and I have no pants or makeup on and my messy bun looks more like Santa got leprosy and crashed his sled into the back of my head then let me be. That's all I'm saying.
He stuck a cigarette in my butt last night. There is no coming back from that.
I HAVE TOO MICH DICK TALKING TO ME IDK WHAT TO DO.
This guy knew what he was doing. Most guys can't find the spot even if it shot off a flare and played a kazoo.
She said my penis was powerful and magnificent
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