If it were my dying wish, would you come over 2nite 2 save me?:):):) wana come anyways?
Soap is not a condiment
He asked if I wanted to blow his flute? Please call me and pretend there is a family emergency!!!
just got a rotting pancake and bacon in the mail from your address....
Besides, I'm not in my 30's. I'm still allowed to drink wine from a bag.
It's like you are the superhero of getting jizzed on
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
I can't keep up with all the guys you're banging. I'm just going to start referring to them by city of origin.
I yelled at the dude who smoked him up "YOU'RE THE REASON I'M NOT GETTING LAID" then went to bed. So yeah, I guess it was an ok night.
He walked in on me banging his sister and said "you're both old enough to make you own decisions. Carry on"
I don't know where I keep finding these guys, but mi power bottoms es su power bottoms.
I don't think "growing medical marijuana" is Quite what my Grandfather had in mind when he thought me about gardening as a child
I'm still drunk dear. I just woke up 3 feet from the front door with 20 dollars worth of taco bell in my hands.
He told me my car had really nice leather seats right before he jizzed all over them.
She tied me to the bed and did lines off my chest before sex. I’m going to put that on my bucket list just so I can cross it off
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