I cant video chat with you tonight, my parents are home
r u implying that im some kind of v-chat prostitution whore?
currently walking past a fire hyrdrant with a hose already attatched.. this could be dangerous..
he has 3 profile pictures up and all of them are him riding jet skis
i hate this class. from the way they're all staring you would think they've never seen a girl in basketball shorts, heels and sunglasses.
Mother fucker. I'm a 30J now. I'm fucking speechless
nothing like walking down the street with a garbage bag of puke trying to find a dumpster
Care to explain why there is sushi in the soap dish in the bathroom
I woke up this morning covered in blood and peanut butter. I am now safe from vampires with nut allergies.
I'm trying to find candidates for my winter break hook up. I'm going to hold auditions thanksgiving break.
she asked me where ive been her entire life and the guy in the room next to us yelled "with other women bitch!"
mate, my mother watched me threw up out of my nose wearing only a g-string.
Would your heart desire to drink copious amounts of alcohol tonight?
Whoa, I am aware of WAY too many squirrels right now...
just for future reference, lake water is NOT mix for hard stuff. nor is it an adequate substitute.
well at least now you can say you got an STD from the frontman of a band no one's heard of
fuck you.
Randomize
