I'm drive I can fine osifer
So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
Theres this fat girl in desperate need of the proactive factory in my class and as i watch her shovel food in her face I am struggling to not only keep down my meager lunch but also to stay straight. Eliza Dushku couldnt even get my flacid dick to move
Last night i was gna tell u about how i was watching project runway & how i was upset bc they replaced tim gunn & heidi klum. but then i realized that i was watching mythbusters.
True life - we need to smoke together more often
I don't wanna do a drive in or see a movie tonight. I wanna play some Golden Tee and butt fuck a girl in the bathroom of some bar and proceed with Golden Tee
Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
No, seriously, 1.5 gallons of sangria plus two days of untapped cock. Waiting here. For you.
She got a digital picture frame for her birthday. FINALLY - a place for me to sneak all those penis shots I've taken with my iPhone.
do you think theyll let us bring mariachis to the strip club?
they're both coked to the gills having a shouting match about the powers and abilities of godzilla. and using the wikipedia entry on the topic to support their respective arguments.
i'm soo broke, the only trip i can afford for spring break is acid
I asked the full emergency room who else was there because of homecoming and every single person raised their hand
Dude, I woke up with wet dollar bills in my boxers where did you take me???
He literally said, while inside me, "I would smack your ass but I don't want to wake my mom up". Amazing.
I might have to quit marching band. It's affecting my drinking schedule
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