I just wish we had the ability to download food from our TVs.
hey can i play with your boom stick tonite? I'll let you shoot the love of jesus in my face.
come over
My itunes is telling me i listened to toxic by b spears 108 times last night
the bouncer kept askin you for id just to see how long it would take you to find your pants
So let me get this straight. You would sleep with an uncircumcised guy whose name you didn't know, but you won't try the new shrimp taco from taco bell?
I have a question, if it paid really well, like ridiculously well, would you be a restaraunts under the table resident blowjob girl?
His idea of romance is drunkenly leaving me dead dandelions on my car in the middle of the night
After it was shut down sean literally made out with four separate girls between the 100 feet to our house. It was a rampage.
There no better feeling of self control than stopping yourself before telling your girlfriend she gives head just like her sister.
And after peeing my pants waiting outside for him, i proceeded to drop down and roll in the nearest puddle to pretend like i just ate shit when he arrived
How does one un superglue their foot to the floor
I am harder than a fucking diamond and Michael Bolton is playing. Your move.
Is there a reason why your pubic hair is a plastic bag on my bathroom floor? And yes I know its yours... You wrote your name on the bag
Last thing googled on my laptop last night was vagina chaffing. What the fuck?
He broke both of his legs jumping out of a window to escape a coyote.
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