Sooo i definitely have a major burn on my chin from kenny's ...stubble from making out for hours while coked up. Pure class.
Don't you think facebook is a bit pretentious, suggesting friends and all? No facebook, I would NOT like to be friends with a girl whose fiancee I have slept with.
i just witnessed two asians having sex for the first time ten feet away from me..hes having a seizure..what the duck is going on???
Just found my toeprints on the glass of his sunroof.
Why are all the dvds taped to the fish tank. Really.
Also, I don't remember opening my gifts from my family. It was cool when I woke up with a new ihome.
She is singing the swedish chef song and throwing utensils. I love this place
Getting my nails done with Diana... I'm going for the keep your friends close and the girl who's dating the guy you want to fuck closer
it is my last wish that my tale be published posthumously as a warning to anyone thinking of eating burger king at nine am
please let it be arousing that I used numbers to figure out how well I'd give you head
I baked a frozen pizza completely, put it back in the plastic and box, and put it back in the freezer. THAT drunk.
I don't intentionally mean to ruin relationships for personal gain but. Yeah nah I totally do.
Pregaming at Jodi's. Ten minutes
Thought it was at Brad's?
Pregaming the pregame. Need alcohol before I can see that dick.
Had a one night stand and didnt remember the guys name until he started sending me poems in the mail.
he would NOT stop making out with my stomach! creeeeeepy
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