That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
i just fingered the ice cream at home instead of getting a spoon
been there done that
I believe that I finger-banged my way to the top of the corporate ladder.
New handbag passed the ultimate test. The walk of shame. I had a bra, tights, skirt, shirt & sweater in it and you couldn't tell. yessss.
we were canoeing in the lake and i asked if he was too drunk for this, and he said "don't worry about it, i'm half native american"
why did you let me tell everyone that you can get herpes from the ice luge and then let me do the ice luge?
No it was the best sex I've had in months. Nothing turns me on more than getting rid of a boyfriend.
Woke up behind one of the fraternity brothers houses in the grass wearing a guinness hat and aviators hugging a 30 rack box with a zonie on my chest next to a campfire.
it's just weird to think of you as a teacher since ive seen you throw up raspberry bacardi in my parents house
Can't decide if this guy is hot or if I'm just bored.
Sex is clearly the solution either way.
We are no longer allowed to make spur of the moment decisions about our love lives
ABSOLUTELY NOT
The waitress at the Denny's in usa remembered me from 2 years ago when we went at 4 in the morning plastered, wearing overalls and huge inflatable corona hats on our heads
I just gave my boss a blowjob. underneath his desk at work. that promotion is mine!
Is it appropriate to be taking shots at 11 on sunday?
Absolutely same thing as church only different
After returning from the hospital with lock-jaw from getting tackle at the game. Some naked chick busted out of his room and hit him with a devastating haymaker to the jaw because he wouldn't have sex
Randomize
