Ok seriously, can we bring back badminton?
whoever gets the blood i just donated is getting a shit ton of free thc
Oh. My. God. Best non-relationship, he-might-be-cheating-on-his-boyfriend-but-I-can't-tell-because-of-the-language-barrier sex EVER!
im sure we could have fun without alcohol but i just dont wanna chance it...
new level of vanity: sex dreams about deep throating myself...
I just want you to know that i just realized your the only friend i dont feel fat around.
In a car. Threw up in my mouth. Haven't said a word in 10 minutes.
You ad-libbed two DETAILED rounds of price is right, 1 wheel of fortune, and 1 deal or no deal.... by yourself with sound effects and music included
I think Facebook knows you fucked me. All of a sudden I get everything you do in my news feed.
Only you would get a side of potential vagina with your sandwich
There is a goat eating lettuce out of our fridge. Do you wanna grab a bloody mary?
I was on top for a full on make out when in dead silence "I'm moaning Myrtle" came from the TV. Moment ruined. I got cock blocked by a fictional ghost
I'm going to make a stack of pancakes and fuck it. Right now.
listen. i haven't sucked a dick in well over three years but i believe in myself.
I'm going to draw something on my chest and I need to incorporate my nipples. Any ideas?
Randomize
