we sang "a whole new world" together. either he's my gay best friend or the love of my life.
Plus she can make a mean sandwich! That's all I really need. Well that and foot jobs...
Poopin on the sidewaaalllkkk. I wish my text told you that was a song
I'm not saying going to the volleyball games drunk on Tuesday night was a bad idea I'm just saying we shouldn't make a routine of it.
Im sorry that my initial plan of you grabbing his dick didnt work out but Im glad you grabbed his heart
Vodka drinking games. Where you wake up next to a douche lord and see your thong in the blinds.
The hot tub didn't work. But it's okay because we discovered just how many people you can fit in a bathtub.
I have major gossip for you.
Oh no, did you have sex last night?
If I had sex last night I'd probably post it on facebook. It's been that long and I'd be that excited.
So she just had an emotional breakdown over a birthday card with a peacock on it. Yeah. She's pretty drunk, but we made it home safely.
TGIFridays...stall number 1...drunk...send help
Yeah that doesn't involve enough booze, count me out
You were just so carefree! People were like, "there's broken glass everywhere" and you were just like, IDGAFFFFFFF
im looking at the positives. number one it stopped me from hooking up with vince infront of his girl, number two it gave me something to do instead of throwing up and number three i fuckin rocked his world
I told my mom that I was just gonna go check the mail. It's been 19 hours, and I woke up in a hot tub covered in chocolate, with a text from her sayin "have fun sweetie"
This is a hot dog holiday. I intend to do my part for the processed meat workers of this great union.
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