love makes seman taste better
I knew I shouldn't have slept with her...my dick looks like a stegosaurus tail
he just fed my chickens on farmville...i guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex<3
she came to the game with a camelback filled with booze. except it was only the bag part so she duct taped to her back
Sounds good! I plan on writing a book entitled: I've Probably Done Cocaine In Your Bathroom. A tell-all by Lauren.
Is it worth it to drive to a zoo with a high possibility of sex at said zoo?
He said bow chicka bow wow. I never thought being sexually degraded would be such a turn on.
Apparently getting dressed is an all-day activity.
I am so juiced up on period drugs and coffee I feel like my skin is going to fall off.
Dude I sat in the corner of the party bobbing my head and singing danger zone
I haven't filled him in on Operation "find a sugar daddy & suck dick for money" yet, but I'm sure he just wants me to be happy.
Despite popular belief cocaine is not a good pre-workout
So when he asked me to go on a date tonight, I didn't think the words "have you tried a suppository" would be part of the evening.
Already doing pt exercises by picking my margarita up off the night stand. Fuck yeah.
3 weeks in a row I've pulled '69' at the deli counter...God is giving me shit for not getting laid in a year....
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