I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
...I woke up with a yo yo in my underwear...
i always knew that i'd have sex in your room, i just assumed it would be with you
Just proved I could salsa dance in a bar where no one was dancing
Sidenote...no idea how to salsa
Overall win. We all know who got to sleep on the concrete outside of Denny's with you.
The topic of sex in the jamba banana suit has come up on multiple occasions. We're just waiting for a moment to try it out.
I ran into his family and they made me a ham sandwich and I asked if they wanted to come streaking. I felt they deserved the invite.
we didnt plan anything. just randomly met up in the park, both reached into our pockets and each lit up a joint without exchanging words. we're telepathic potheads.
Something like that. Healthy diet of beer, ranch sunflower seeds and sex keeps me young.
Im so hungover I just threw up at the sight of a CARTOON CRABBY PATTY
I feel like I should have held a press conference. The state of my vagina
When we got into his bed, his damn parrot started making sex noises in the other room
I just realized that this is the first time I've ever seen your mom without sucking your cock.
I love friends. Friendship is wonderful. I wish the rain was my friend
Neighbor just came over and asked if I had anything to clean blood out of carpet... it's definitely time to move.
Randomize
