I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
Why have they been driving around the block for the past 30 min?
He told her it was international road head day.
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
Please God, is a penis possibly making it to vagina town to much to ask for tonight.
I have dibs on his crisis of faith.
I drank enough to tranq a steed. You really missed out
My roommate just caught me cleaning a tostitos queso jar with my hand and eating it. He didn't judge. Bonding moment.
WHY WONT HOT GETMAN MAKR PUPR WITH ME!!!!???!?!!
Is it counter productive to ride on my exercise bike with a cocktail in hand?
I feel like my stoner spirit animal is Janice from the muppets.
Your Vodka Saturday privileges have been reduced to Beer until you go a full month without losing an article of clothing.
i just got carded for condoms. wtf.....this is new. isnt safe sex a good thing?
This girl in my class is lecturing my professor about zombies. It has been going on for 15 minutes.
Zombies?
Zombies.
If I could tell my younger self three things it would be: 1. Smoke a lot more weed 2. Have a lot more sex 3. Own a good set of pots and pans
God knew I'd have horrible taste in men, so made me asexual to ensure I'd never fuck them.
Randomize
