Alex texted me. Bootycall boy #2. its like an alarm goes off once i'm single that the line is open again
I didn't cheat on him. Cheating means finding out. I made sure he was at work first. After the guy left I got shitfaced just so nothing seemed out of the ordinary when he came home.
I'm so used to throwing up its no longer a game of hanging over the toilet. Now it's just 'stand up, aim for the toilet, do my thing' then walk out
I don't remember much but I know I looked hot.
I would have rather watched a full length video of myself masturbating than heard that.
please dont ever try to drink horizontally again. I thought I was going to have to give you cpr
Dont even bother asking why she was dancing with him on top of a door, let alone how the door ended up being used as a table.
Yes, she gives me platonic blowjobs as part of our friendship.
Other than a hickey from some random Canadian roller derby girl, I came out unscathed
Sorry I forced you to take an adderall at 1am and then proceeded to dance to Lose Yourself outside of Qdoba.
Now the circle is complete. Just interviewed a guy who was a higher up member of the team I worked for in my job before this place
Happy Birhtday!
Dad, it's 3am and it's not my birthday... wherever you are, go home
It's an open bar. I'm gonna be gone when you get here.
Text me the address now before you're too drunk to text English.
He was on top and as he finished he yelled "I love gold" , so yeah I'm seeing him later tonight
Yes. I'm realizing that sports games are good reasons to drink. I just cheer when everyone else cheers.
Randomize
