the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
I an trashes at a wedding. Hotbcousins here I come. Agh.
Where's the Hot Mess Express headed tonight?
I hope that's not the new nickname for my friends and me.
We walked in and the first thing we heard was, "OH SHIT! White chicks!" Naturally, I made some new male friends.
Just saw a guy at the gas station legitimately dressed in exactly what my costume was last night. Fuck his life.
I'm drinking Dom Perignon from the bottle with a straw just to piss of some french dude.
There's a very real possibility that I'll wake up in your uncle's driveway.
You poured your drink on yourself and then said "it's not a party until I'm wet"
Stop making Mac and cheese and sit on his face. FINISH HIM
I just watched some guy take a shot of jack Daniels, chase it with a shot of ciroc & then violently rip his pants off. You have to come here.
I woke up last night a kitchen floor with my shirt off and I love America written on my leg in eye liner
I just went to add a song I had never heard before to my "high as fuck" playlist and it was already there.
Sorry I wasn't opportunistic about sucking your dick in an Uber last night
I successfully cockblocked 5 people in one night. I wasnt getting any, why should they.
Randomize
