no more stoned jack in the box. this is the third night in a row.
she's sitting on the other side of the room at this party. with her smirnoff tucked in that little opening between her cleavage and shirt. drinking from a straw. snapping her fingers off beat.
it's love
I felt weird they were both staring at me waiting for the scoop on how your vagina felt.
It's sore actually
I just woke up and shes still asleep next to me with her vibrator inside her and on. Whats normal protocol for this situation?
I've been watching anime, masturbating and eating nutella for three days. I hope she never comes back.
It starts with an S and ends with arah just gave me a bj.
I think the tooth fairy visited me last night... after I chipped my tooth n blacked out, I woke up to my purse filled with cocaine n sequins.
i understand you have values and thats awesome, all i want to help you do is forget about them breifly
We just laid there in bed together, petting his dick and repeating, "IT FEELS LIKE VELVET!!!"
EMERGENCY FRIEND CRISIS: WE HAVE TOO MUCH WHISKEY. ABORT HANGING OUT WITH MELISSA, RECOMMEND TO HANG OUT WITH OUR WHISKEY INSTEAD
Day 10 and still no sign of rescue in my pants.
I'm at the nutcracker high as shit. It's so beautiful. I cried.
Hey kevin, it's Ashlee. I have been trying to get ahold of you. Your pledge gave me your number. I really wanted to apologize for shitting in your car I'll buy new upholstery or pay to have it shampooed if needed. I'm so embarrassed.
you put your keys in the fridge so you wouldn't forget your yoohoo
Yeah. We had phone sex then cried together, it was beautiful and heartbreaking
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