im marching my happy ass in there and im not leaving until he cheats on his girlfriend!
champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
So for a second i just thought clitoris was a disease.
I need to find my pants, a way out of here, and a cheeseburger.
After he was done he gave me a case of landshark and tickets to tomorrows yankee game. This is the best nonrelationship ever
last nights episode of shot friends brought to you by polish vodka and flamingo baseball. pickles cure hangovers.
the repo guy said it was the first time he'd ever started to repo a car with someone fucking inside of it. he might have said 'doing it' instead.
I feel like he's only with me because no one else would blow him.
We made a water bong out of a wine bottle... Being an architect major finally payed off.
Man, I wish they all looked like that. Your vagina deserves to have a nice frame around it, and God's signature at the bottom.
Also his beard was very delicious looking. I wanted to touch it so bad, but I held back.
The band last night was really good
That was definitely karaoke. Guess that answers my follow up question on how drunk you were.
I did get to watch you pee, tho. That counts as another precious moment.
So do I get to ride the beginning of the November stache or what?
Every time I try to do something productive I end up searching ghost porn.
Randomize