So drunk i had to piss sitting down...
so i woke up thsi morning with a phadora on my head, no shirt and a huge hangover? want to help me figure this out?
I think I took your hangover as a birthday present
i've noticed that whenever i have to ask myself "would i be doing this if i was sober?" the answer is probably no.
tequila makes me forget i have legs
He still lectured me about forgetting shit. Than he said he's gonna paint me green so I can stand in a corner and be a plant.
I'm sorry that I ate boneless ribs off of your sister, but that is no reason to drink my alcohol.
I'll be listening to "I will always love you" and sobbing uncontrollably all night, care to join?
Flaming shots last night. Missing an eye brow. There a connection?
We fucked then made friendship bracelets, his mother taught him right!
Alls I remember is making out with that chick.
Nope that was a dude
God gave me a talent besides one night stands. I feel like I should use it
I'm too old for chlamydia. That's for 20 year olds who go to clubs and do drugs I've never heard of.
You have my heart. You only share my vagina.
We're both fucking guys named Frank. Our friendship was meant to be.
Randomize
