I am puke
why does the wii remote smell like your vag?
High enough to fry lime slices.....tasted like shit, by the way
If my bosses could see, smell or hear me right now they would understand why its a horrible idea to keep the office open sundays
woke up to the trail of sugar cubes leading to my bed........was i that uncooperative last night
They had an entire room dedicated to passed out people. It was like a dogpile of cross faded toddlers drooling on each other.
Just got physical proof that at 6 am i was running around with raw potatoes threatening to mash them on his floor. Hello, Mobile uploads
...Then she just started hitting me with a loaf of bread.
Do you think royal wedding drunk calls for wine or tequila?
I cant feel my face. Like I dont even know if I have one. I wish I had a helmet
That's exactly how my pussy feels when I shave it. Like a cross between a naked mole rat and a newborn child. Embrace it.
I bet it kind of sucks while you do community service I'm getting blown in the shower. haha
Thats why you dont have a "jubilant gunfire celebration"
It was good. Ended up having a 3 hr make out session with her
What is this high school
There was a lot of catching up to do bro
Isn't it funny how we're still best friends after that incident with the old lady in the bathroom
You fucking bailed on me. But I love you still
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