Nothing is worse than puking naked in front of strangers
I'm eating my dinosaur chicken nuggets in the order they would die in the food chain.
There's a high school volleyball camp on campus this summer. I'm definitely going to jail.
it never fails, everytime he manages to fuck my earrings out of my ears.
I blacked out after the shots of canned lobster bisque.
do you actually have a paper bowl full of broken glass and ecstasy or was that just a dream?
He fucked me so hard I might have to go to the hospital for internal bleeding
Can I have him when you're done?
look in the field by the highway and see if there is a high heel there. Or some Taco Bell bags.
eating on the run again ?
He invites me over too FucK and i wind up eating 6 jimboys tacos with his roommates. While he waited in his room. Maybe next time
Is her dick bigger than yours?
By the way can you translate "sorry, she played you bruh" to Spanish? Some Hispanic guy who spoke absolutely no English callled me last night and when I tried to tell him he had the wrong number the response was "como? No no no no...." And then click. He was gone
What's rude is him not accepting my blowjob offer. What kind of guy denies that.
If I call him daddy should I get him a father's day card? Serious question
Hey I need you to run the morning meeting, for reasons I can explain when I find out where I left my car
Basically we had a threesome in one room and a fivesome in the next room. Its what I like to call a win win situation.
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