doesn't he have a GF?
that just means you have to try harder.
i didn't have to try TOO hard, just told him i didn't want to know his name or...
i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
if i could have babies with my dog i totally would cause i know thay would be fucking hott babies.
well on the bright side, he charges $60 for an eighth
so he'll probably take me somewhere nice
shit is crazy. i just keep thinking that this kid growing inside Emily used to live in my balls.
Even DaVinci knew it was gay to draw the penis big. Thanks art history
We lost the cork forthe wine, so we used a tampon as a replacement. I never loves tampons so much
Just got my period. This just makes my beach escapade totally even that much more ok.
Let's have sex soon. Just us!! Its sad that I have to specify.
He fell off a seesaw, tore half his ear off and somehow convinced the paramedic he was allowed to have a beer while being treated
So idk if it's because I'm working out again or the coke, but I hit my target weight today. Whaaaat uuuup. Come and get me thanksgiving.
I tried to force my roommate into a sink last night. And I almost won.
He is so sweet! He thanks me for sending him dirty pix. I should keep him.
I just set my messenger to Away so I could run downstairs to masturbate. Working from home is the BEST
If you ever get divorced...would you call me??
Randomize
