I just didn't expect you to be so naked....
ya and he came three minutes into it because he didnt have sex all summer
oh that makes more sense i knew you arent that good
she kept checking the clock when she was giving me head and at midnight she said she had to stop because she cant eat meat on fridays is that bitch serious
at the last minute we also decided to throw an egg in the beer bong. and he drank it, shell and all.
its official. the only way for my hair to look good is to blow somebody
I feel like I just need to fuck him after all his effort. like a "hey man good try" like those kids who get last place and still get a trophy.
I'm going out w/ her for her b-day in a bit. I just talked to one of her drunk friends on the phone who asked if I could "handle 7 lesbian." This could be interesting.
It's his sex noise. "I'm gonna cu-THE LORD IS MY SHEPARD AND I SHALL NOT WANT"
I just pulled the nickels from earlier out of my bra in class. The guy next to me is either terrified or intrigued.
Some cougar Brit said she loved me. America is bouncing back.
although steph and I had 3 bottles of wine by that point and watched an opera that featured a black dildo so anything was possible really
Either of you know why the shower was on and the bathroom door wide open with no one in there at 6 in the morning?
I woke up to a stripper (who added me on Facebook) messaging me reminding me to cancel my card if I can't find it
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
I'M HANGING OUT WITH THE DRUG DEALER UPSTAIRS JUST SO I CAN STEAL HIS WIFI PASSWORD, I HOPE Y'ALL LOVE ME.
Randomize
