I just heard a teenager say to his friend "dats my baby! i was hittin her up on myspace like gurllll. she got me steamin". must have missed the memo its 2005 and we still use myspace.
at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
Tell me the dirtiest joke you know
Sarah Palin
god, I love you
She looks makes a Zellweger face when she cums, she's keeps asking why I call her renee
Jesus once told his disciples that its better to hang out with your best friend than give some douche bag a bj.
Second day of summer classes and i already got this girl to send me nudes during class
that is WHY your in summer classes
worth it
No, listening to the fray and drinking a bottle of jack daniels does not count as counseling
My clit is not a Gobstopper. Cut it out.
You yelled "hold my dick" before you tackled the guy away from the dj and two random girls moved to actually hold it, then argued about it. I want that whore aura!
If TJ is short for Trader Joe, I'm gonna fuck him
WHAT IS MY LIFE THAT THE ONLY PERSON INTERESTED IN FUCKING ME IS MY 6TH GRADE MATH TEACHER
Never in a million years thought I would have to put jello shot recipe/equation into an excel spreadsheet
Maybe because you rubbed my clit while we were making churros
This conversation went from me banging other women's husbands to learning about baked goods. If that isn't personal growth I don't know what is.
I have a lot of money, and no morals. shots on you when you get here.
Randomize
