I didnt pay $190 for a fake with a new middle name of Vane..
By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
Drinking Grey Goose on the toilet. Don't make me graduate.
He was like an evil genius with the clitoris. I don't stand a chance.
im probably the most hungover person watchin icarly right now
Dude, I don't care how big her tits are. I have to dump her. She shit in my shower.
Chelsea passed out in the kiddie pool. Just added around 28 boxes of jello powder. Will let you know how it works out
I'm pretty sure blacking out is a coping mechanism.
You just wrote a check for drugs...pretty sure you don't have cash for beer..
Happiness is having a 12 hour day thinking that there are only 2 beers in the fridge when you get home, but then finding 8. Fuck you Monday, this week I won.
Come to Des Moines on Saturday, handcuff yourself to me and drink a bottle of vodka
it was just another one of those moments where you unfriendzone a friend you assumed to be gay
Why is your ex naked in my apartment?
Who the fuck stole my fridge again
If by fun you mean, did I meet her cousin for the.first time and bang him, then yes it was a productive evening.
Randomize