Somehow after we left in 3 different cars to all go to different places we still all ended up in the emergency room
i dont care how hungover you are, go back to the frat house and get him. HE IS 11.
Thanks to her sunglasses tan, I can't look at her when she blows me cause it's like getting blown by a raccoon. A very talented raccoon
Either way, we will celebrate half Christmas the only way we can. Completely and irresponsibly wasted.
The only thing he had going for him was mad fingering skills. the ONLY thing. crayons have a wider circumference.
Okay hun. Well my neighbors haven't called the cops yet so I think we're good. No more burning in the yard.
Yknow what, if there is a thug life for white bitches, I'm living it. I went out on a date, watched howls moving castle with my brother till he passed out, then went and got some a+ dick, and made it home in time to take my mom to work. Now its 7am, I'm in bed with some free tacos, and when I'm done eating I'm going to sleep. What a great night.
its one thing to be single and another thing to be single and then have your profile picture be of you and the cat
your picture is with misty too!!
I AM SINGLE BY CHOICE
So heartbroken my rebound has a rebound
Dude random question. Where you with me when the vulture got electrocuted from the power lines and fell on the sidewalk in front of us?
I hoped the great care he put into rolling a blunt would translate to my vagina.
I'd risk everything I own for 10 min naked with her, 2 would be sex and the rest me crying like a little girl.
By talk things out did he mean have passionate angry sex?
My liver has officially said "fuck this shit" and escaped from my body.
And then she grabbed my dick and started singing 'ring ring ring ring banana phone'
Randomize
