Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
how do you clear previous safari searches on an iPhone? i asked my brother to google something for me and "big penis" "empire chinese food" and "reverse cowgirl" popped up.
would it be inappropriate to describe you with the phrase "bigass titties"?
we were holding hands throwing up into the same garbage can; if thats not true love i dont know what is .
mowing the lawn. still drunk. If my dad doesn't appreciate this I swear I'm dissowning everyone including him
We asked "Is that Andy puking in the bushes, its 7 AM" he looks up and goes "It's okay guys, its 7:30"
Can we hire someone to dj while we have sex?
Between the plague n the counterfeit drugs we brought back from mexico I'm not thinking too highly of their country right now. Screw mexican homeless men.
Do you think you can get drunk by standing in a tank of vodka if it is seeping into your skin?
He talked me into making a sex video, no worries though, I was wearing sunglasses.
I am lonely and hungry. I need a girlfriend, but I'd settle for my mom.
Being responsible doesn't make memories.
I found my wallet. Still have no idea when I put mad dog in my steel water bottle, though...
Taking a shot every time the Russian in COD says vodka... BEST drinking game ever.
My boss walked into my office and gave me a toothbrush and tips for dealing with sex hair. She knows what’s up
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