I got wasted for the 1st time and I sat in a fridge for 2 hours and a trash can?
he's chasing his jose cuervo with hot tub water
I decided that just having that story under my belt and being able to tell it to my grandchildren is worth the regrets of the evening.
He told everyone he was going inside...an hour later we get a knock on the garage door from some dude telling us a guy is passed out on the lawn and we should get him inside because it's about to rain
Even though ive seen her get fisted by another girl at a party, shes still a doctor.
so according the 72 facebook statuses i put up last night that i don't recall, i would say it was a success. how about you?
My password hint says "not sunset, also facebook." i need to stop doing computer things while high. I will never figure this clue out.
I swear with his long flowing hair and god-like body he looked like Jesus, a bong hitting Jesus
You have no idea how pumped I am. I literally plan on dying. You're in my will
Dude... I had a dream that I was getting high for the first time. I got to experience my weedginity again. It was glorious.
I may be a feminist, but I am not above using my body to distract you if it means I might beat you in a game of scrabble.
YOU JUST GOT OUT OF THE HOSPITAL AND YOU'RE ALREADY DRINKING?!
Wtf is this place? I don't see any alcohol and I feel like we were supposed to bring our own strippers.
Gave his drunk ass water, & he poured it on my shirt while saying "WET T-SHIRT CONTEST!" When reminded of it today he replied with, "at least you came in first place"
I just had a morning three-some with marijuana and a detachable shower-head
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