what do you think about when you wanna get rid of a boner?
dying kittens.
Is it a bad sign when i blow my nose && can smell vodka?
I wake up every morning and wish that I didn't have to wear a bra
we have to get out to the bar earlier. all of the guys are already committed to the girls they're going home with.
they described our state of being as looking similar to a crime scene....you were on the ground and i was running around screaming.
you know you made out with my sister while holding Ur girlfriends hand while she was puking in the toilet right
Haha jealous. If I could remember my dreams I'm pretty sure they would constantly be about being drunk in foreign countries
I was going to make out with him...then he licked syrup off the kitchen floor.
He just subscribed to one of my Spotify playlists. The next step is sex.
Just wiped the ashes off my forehead before he came over to have sex. Definitely going to hell.
Seriously. If I'd known all it took was a 29 year old UPS guy to make me feel THIS SEXY, I'd have been fucking them for 30 years.
We fucked to Bonnie Tyler in my car. He's the one.
You were in no condition to manage a 3-way.
So chicken strips and confidence do not you make you sober.
hey sweets how's ur crotch today?
Randomize