READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
I woke up and there was 3 different size condom wrappers on the floor. What is this goldie locks and the 3 condoms???
I recorded his drunk dial calls. My personal favorite was the one that began, "grab the bull by the horns and fuck his cock."
so we were pounding it out and someone knocked on the wall and was shouting at us
that didnt stop you
nope
we went to sleep in different beds and woke up spooning. alcohol truly is the anti-cockblocker.
Also, just saw a homeless man answer a phone call on a blackberry...
My piss changed color midstream. Think that means I have a 50/50 chance of passing the test?
People said that when they tried to talk to me I answered that there was a glass around my head stopping me from answering them
There is a chick at the bar in a bumble bee onesie, complete with wings. Yeah, I must be back in Seattle.
If you're going to do that you're going to need a pleather suit.
Dude so last night I was eating out my gf and her kitten climbed onto my back and fell asleep. AND SHE DIDN'T NOTICE FOR LIKE 10 MINUTES
It reeks of weed and poor life decisions in here
He told me that he'd ride his snowmobile from Cincinnati to Toledo in this blizzard just so I could give him head.
you yelled, puked and cried then passed out in the fetal position in your underwear
Damn, I just did coke with a dude in a bathroom and after he took his dick out right in front of me and took a piss. What a power move.
Randomize
