so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
I went to blockbuster, where I always go when I need to soul searching
Despondent, hopeless, I decide on vantage point, because I vaguely resemble matthew fox (let me believe this, please)
It was cheaper to buy then rent, so now I'm stuck w/ a wretched hangover and I own this shit movie
Grown men dancing to Spice Girls and a girl wearing one shoe. I belong here
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
I woke up with the new contact "Britney Both Nipples Pierced"... how do you think the night went?
I feel like a great embryo-shaped weight has been lifted off my shoulders.
I love how our sober spotter means you only have to stay sober enough to type your pin in an ATM
Where is my rescue team. I keep hiding shit. And I'm trying to give out shots of olive oil
i just had to hear from a third party that he came inside of me
We got a 5L jug of wine for 3 Euro. Italy was a good choice.
It's official. Hawaii is 100% better when you're stoned.
I looked up while we were having sex to see him covering my pillow pet's eyes with his free hand. I think I'm in love
Hey, so, you were my "one phone call" last night... Thanks for not picking up. See, this is why I never call you.
I would totes reciprocate the nip pic, but I'm sick with a piece of tissue shoved up one of my nostrils and I'm just not feeling that ambitious. Sorry.
He actually said the words 'I miss you' followed by 'I wanna have sex with your face'. I'd say that's a win.
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