Dude ... paraplegic porn is really creative..
he's chasing his jose cuervo with hot tub water
Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
why is there a handicap sign in the bathtub and an exit sign in the kitchen?
lets deal with that after we figure out where i am
Next thing I know we're all standing in the kitchen holding hands and thanking God for the beer.
I ended up staying at a police station for being a witness in a public masturbation case..NOW do you believe me that I've never had a good St. Patrick's Day?
Dad and I are shitfaced screaming at Canadians in Walmart. Life is good.
There's a drag queen here that reminds me strongly of you. You should try crossdressing.
Can you bring home bongs? Like all the bongs. I need bongs
You made out with him a lot. Almost as much as you told everyone Paul was the zamboni guy.
Blacking out is all I've done this year and we're only 3 days in. Checkmate bitch.
My brother just text me asking if I was ready for the blowjob of my life.
If i'm forever fucked up in this state of mind then I'm going to kill him for this
Do you know why I woke up with a half peeled lemon in my purse with a post-it that said "eat me" on it?
Hypothetically speaking, at what point does fire become too much fire?
Randomize
