I'd fuck her but she fucked Dusty. And I'm pretty sure he's humped livestock
So I just had this crazy idea, and no it has nothing to do with the fact that they made me take shots at work.
how many beers do i need before it is acceptable to sleep with sam
enough that when i make fun of you for it tomorrow you wont even remember it happening
I think he may have called me a bar rat, jokingly. I said i was but in a non-trashy way.
i'm watching the fashion show on bravo
you're cheating on project runway?
if you can't score coke, you buy crack.
i lost virginity while listening to candy shop. something in my life has finally gone right.
Is it bad when your hot neighbor is crying on her porch, and your 2nd thought is "maybe her boyfriend cheated on her and she'll want to fuck me for revenge sex?"
Perfectly normal.
He pointed at some girls and said "I'm gonna have sex with them girls over there", and disappeared.
I just got a call from the front desk apparently one of my feiends was dropped off by a handicap bus passed out in a wheel chair unlv is goig down
Suppose hypothetically u received a request for face time communication with a gentleman who looked astonishingly like a penis. Would you indulge him in conversation? Hypothetically of course.
You better fucking tell me or I'm turning blow job week into go fuck yourself week.
Yeah. Still not happy that my prof saw a picture of my vag.
Blacked in cold and wet, with them areound me singing Aaaaall we are saaaaayiiiing is YOU PEED YOUR PANTS
You know it's a pretty bad night when an injured penis is not the worst thing that happened to you. Fuck tequila
Her pegging playlist is all heavy metal so stay away if you wanna keep your ass intact
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