...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
Kelly went into her room with Dave, but is moaning Tommy...
We agreed on being friends w/ benefits. Lets see if that really happens.
Ok, so that was not supposed to go to u, my bad. I feel horrible.
So did the night end well for you?
I stole a traffic cone and drunk texted my sister because i couldn't think of any other girl to text
You were so drunk last night you typed www.face.come/cheese.com as if you were logging into facebook.
if women knew the size of my dick, theyd be much more receptive to my sloppy drunken advances
She broke both of her ankles trying to jump off the balcony. it's like every time she drinks she makes even more impressively bad decisions than the last time
It'll be like a meth lab. But with jello.
I packed spaghetti and rum. But panties? Nah
He's standing in the corner rubbing his nipples and reflecting on poor life choices
"my nose is broken but I'm beer pong champ so it evens out really"
I felt I lost my designated buddy on a field trip when you wandered off to get high with strangers.
I convinced her that there were two p's in Chipotle - the 2nd one was silent.
Just walked out of the train bathroom after having sex and got a round of applause from the passengers. Definitely the best part of the trip.
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