I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
Guy next to me is looking up how to press his own ecstasy pills. I'm going to befriend him and see where this goes
all i wanted was to be slutty. now i'm meeting him for drinks tomorrow because he woke up before i had a chance to sneak out and was too polite to say no
Not only is it unacceptable to be bar hopping alone at 5 o'clock. It is definitely unacceptable to do so with a lobster
I enjoy it and I rock at it. I wish there were a respectable way to make giving blow jobs a career.
What's more sad than going to Target to buy Plan B and the new Sam Smith album?
A guy in a gorilla mask got blown on the lawn. And then the night got weird.
Apparently she "missed me" and the only logical solution was to fuck my brother.
And besides a nice relationship, I just really want to get laid damnit
I'm sorry I was just sleeping on the kitchen floor I'm too dead to think
So the bar crawl I'm on is a "90s bar crawl" and I made the joke about a few overweight girls that "lack of concern for your weight is so 90s" it did not end well
We went from him going down on me to swapping baby pictures of our moms.
Did I tell you about my dream that I got handed a $100 and my vagina dissolved it? I think it wants me to not be a whore anymore.
No I feel the same as usual. Mopey with a chance of bitch fits.
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