so then they started chanting "LET'S GET A LITTLE BIT SCHWASTED. S-H-W-...WASTED!" theres nothing like partying with former high school cheerleaders
So there's dick imprints in the peanut butter
All I remember is taking a bath, puking in the bath water numerous times while trying to wash myself and I must of eventually given up
I want to apologize in advance in the event I put my boobs in your face
Either I need to stop bringing you back to my apt or I need to stop buying ikea furniture
Beer lympzucs are ki7lling me
My brain is foggy with friends reruns and him licking hummus off my tits.
studying for my Anatomy final and masturbating to Japanese porn are practically the same thing
Oh yes. Made out with a grandmother..... she had fake boobs and it was 330am. That makes it okay.
Mardi gras at its finest.
She just cut the six pack plastic up and screamed "save the dolphins"..she also threw away cans of tuna. I like this girl.
I think that's the key to being an adult though... Get those rapid fire beer shits out I the way early, then you can go about your grown man business
to instagram or to not instagram the picture i took of when i shit in the urinal
I tried to be mean but not so mean that he won't bone me next weekend
I saw seagulls fucking earlier today. What have you done with your life recently?
Sooooooo, maybe just fucked on a motorcycle.
Randomize
