butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
Woke up this morning at my parent's house. No idea how I got here... what happened last night? Was it bad?
We using my standards or yours?
I think id rather eat ped egg shavings.
Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
im holly from the hills drunk
remember, YOU ARE A WINNER
my dinner was a box of cheezits simultaneously mixed in with cocoa puffs and fried rice.
FUCK BUDDYS DON'T HOLD HANDS. NO EXCEPTIONS.
But mostly fuck him senseless. Render him speechless. Have him look at my vagina and wonder, "WHAT SORCERY IS THIS?!"
Although a guy bought me a shot of fireball last wknd and I told him he wouldn't even get half a handjob for that and walked away so don't tell me I don't have standards
I need a good cry or an orgasm and neither of them are gonna happen to me and i'm so frustrated
I woke up to his balls in my face, so naturally I limboed under him and headed to the bathroom. When I came out he was asleep on the floor.
How did you tell her we met?
I told her that we met at the sex shop down the street, I thought it would be the most reasonable explanation.
My mom found your leather pants in our guest room. She doesn't want to know why they are there, she just wants to know if you want them washed.
I sit across from him at graduation so I get to stare at him and think about how I fucked his step brother and laugh to myself
you had me at "meet me in the bathroom"
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