i got turned down by a girl after she saw how big my penis was and she said "thats not goin in me"
it never fails, everytime he manages to fuck my earrings out of my ears.
he's dressed up as pikachu 3 fucking years in a row and gotten laid each time. i don't understand
Overall win. We all know who got to sleep on the concrete outside of Denny's with you.
Dont worry about getting me anything... Just put a bow on your ass.
Deal.
Me and this 7 year old almost finished a large pizza. And when I say me and this 7 year old I really mean me.
I know you're gay. But if I'm not getting dick, then you have to. That's what friends do.
I feel like on the last day of finals we should run around campus dressed like Moses screaming "LET MY PEOPLE GO!!!!"
I'll start the recruiting
He is 30 (that's 8 years older than I am) and uses more Emojis than I do. Problem?
Plus i lost a button on my shirt and we got free drinks all night. Sorry I'm not sorry.
I'm in jersey with marbles.. He's blasted about to fuck a manatee and his entire family is trying to stop it. His mother punched me in the chest for not trying hard enough
We should have a mid-burrito sex-break, too. Just so we don't get too full all at once
Good point.
We will let tequila do the talkin this weekend
Erin was right. There were bees at the after hours.
So our night ended with 6 cruisers, a fire truck, and an ambulance. Also, lots of blood. How was yours?
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