So tell me more about the cum that came out of your nose
Shark Week may as well be Shark Weed.
i keep walking around campus wondering if anyone is as stoned as i am
Can we ask the Hungry Howie's guy to pick up some blunt wraps on the way over?
I just realized my mom and I make the same noises when we have sex. Fuck.
I only want to make out with him. Unless I get hungry. In that case I will take him home and screw him as a distraction from eating.
As for the 14 hours of vodka. I am all that is man.
I mean like, my liver will beg my brain for mercy. Brainll be like I'm Greg Jennings. Liverll be like I'm Darren Sharper. Brainll be like hold my diiiiick.
Just smoked pot with a guy who has apparently been living in the woods for over a month. He just walked out of the woods. This is not real life.
rigging a system to keep my jello shots cold in class. important election day work.
That's right. I did.
You are the saddest 25 year old gay man I've ever had the displeasure of knowing.
I decided to start over my porn collection by deleting the old stuff. That was a sad piece of a pie chart...
Remember when we tried to have fun last time..? I got put in a choke hold and you woke up in some ones car.
He said he wanted to lick the breadcrumbs off my chest
At one point she put on my dads pants and yelled after him EMILIOOOO! Dude, my dads name is Mark.
Randomize
