laying in bed listening to christian music, jealous of the hope they have for their life. also need to beat off, can i think about you?
yeah my parents were only ten feet away and we somehow managed to do it in five different positions without them noticing
where are you?
sonic
Good. I hungoveredly cleaned your room. This is what being married is going to be like. I pick the condoms up off the floor and you bring home the hot dogs.
I hate girls that dress up to come to planned parenthood. I just want to be like we are all in the same boat here, we know your slutty. Its OK.
You've picked up chicks by quoting metal bands
When they're drunk they believe it's Shakespeare...enjoy the simple things
It's one of those days where you order the free Papa John's pizza so the delivery guy can bring you Coke to go with your rum. The tip was more than the order.
Don't make it weird, I don't think about you when I'm climaxing, it's just that I see you rooting me on.
He said he wanted to "superfuck" me
Does he wear a cape??
I can't believe I'm giving you play by plays of this sexting convo. It's like a three way he doesn't know about.
Lets just say my thoughts when getting dressed this morning was "vagina friendly" options
If the ex isent in town and im crying under a table somewhere because of it can we go to a drag show or something
We watched Purple Rain and then proceeded to have sex while listening to the album. If that's not exactly how Prince would want people to honor him, I don't know what is
Can I just fuck someone without it basically becoming an arranged marriage
saw a family tailgating a graduation with hard liquor... i'm assuming yours?
are you shitting me? they told me they'd at least wait until 10am
I cannot believe I am seriously having a conversation about my best friend's sexual prowess as a dream lesbian.
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