i just told a girl i would suck the alcohol out of a deoderant stick
Oh my god. I just envisioned myself eating panda meat. I need to get out of this class.
I love the "adulterer" look on you. It's hot.
Its part of my fall instant classic line.
i think of them as a grilled chicken salad and a fried chicken biscuit. obviously Amy is better for me, but when i'm eating her all i can think about is how much better the blonde must taste.
We're doing a case race on Saturday.
I'm in. I'm currently drinking a beer in the bathtub so I guess I can consider this "practice" and not just "alcoholism"
Walk of Shame today included voting.
I think throwing up in my her purse is probably why we broke up
I'm really sorry I gave you road head last night and made you drive over and break the sprinkler system.
We found you naked curled up in a ball in the closet, using a gorilla suit as a blanket
At one point I thought we were going to have to fuck our way out of their apartment
I just had to break into my old house and steal my sex tape. Good times. How have you been?
I feel as though my head has drastically changed shape
You tried to ride his dick and fell off. Then tried to ride the floor. That's why he hasn't called back
No one wants to start their day off with bloody lemons and a tampon in the toilet. Wtf.
beach body workouts will consist of dancing and cocaine, and sugar free redbull
Randomize
