Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
I'm youtube-ing children's choirs. Am I adorable? Or am I a child predator?
Predator. Straight up.
i know they say sex burns calories but i think i actually gained weight from just lying there for the whole 2 minutes
I put it into a sports analogy for him: there are three teams in the league- friends, fuck buddies, and dating, and the fuck buddies roster is full, pick an alternate team
facebook friend requested him the morning after while he was still asleep in my bed, a whole new level of creeper even for me
going to class with no bra.. is that saying "i don't give a fuck i'm one hour away from thanksgiving break?"
i walked in and you were spoon feeding your sister grape juice out of a tupperware.
btw when he was trying to sleep i was apparently poking him in the face w my 'flipper' slurring random manatee facts
Of course the bar would go completely silent right as I yell out "I don't have AIDS"
$200 on plane. $110 on train. $5 per drink on plane. $15 per case on train. Plane 1 hour flight. Train 9 hour excursion. Hmmmmm.
I AM COVERED IN FAKE BLOOD AND REAL CUM. I AM AWESOME
Omg I literally just wanna sleep with you right now. Like actual sleep. Not sex. Well maybe. But sleep first
But seriously, I love you and you are a good person and I'll get you some ecstasy
It’s like I’m living in some alternate wet dream universe right now
I’ve slept with a Senior, a Freshman and a Junior so far. I’m a Sophomore away from hitting for the cycle
Randomize
