U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
My butt just had a miscarriage. It was yours. I'm sorry. You would have been a great sexually confused parent.
i just ate two sandwiches and am debating booty calling my landlord
felt a little awkward waiting for my McNuggets after vomiting all over the counter
they found her hiding behind the couch trying to feed a cabbage patch doll a bottle of tequila. please tell me she's on birth control.
M WATCHING THE HISTORY CHANNEL AND IT SAID THAT WHEN THE LUST PART OF THE BRAIN IS ACTIVATED THE JUDGEMENT PART IS NOT. THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
im never drinking wine from a person in a wet suit and goggles ever again.
btw im using a cooler as a purse cause i love string cheese
What are you doing and how can I add sex in there
Oh god now he thinks I'm into him because I've been staring at him trying to figure out what animal he looked like
Why did I ever allow that penis to enter my sacred temple?
My FitBit tracked the calories I burned during sex. Hello 2015!
Today one of my patients offered me pot brownies. Medical school worth it. Living the dream.
So it turns out strippers do encores if enough people yell. Encore song: Self Esteem.
... and this time i WILL NOT make out with anyone dressed as batman.
Randomize
