We were so bored at work tonight that we were in dry storage taking turns pouring the boxed wine we use for cooking into each others' mouths. I think I'm starting to understand the "problem" aspect of "drinking problem."
but she was nice to me.
She was a fuckin STRIPPER.
How do you tell if you're on the terrorist watch list?
Just found the video that explains the neighborhood applause. Your landlord is awesome, and the clothes are on the roof
I have absolutely nothing sober to say to you.
Bering your kids um. Abiout tol. Throw up
Dude, someone broke the toilet seat in two, the is a pair of panties on the kitchen counter, and the entire house smells like a brewery
I'm starting to think you fell asleep on your kitchen floor pantless with salsa spilt around you
I think we can all agree that the size of her boobs, combined with beer, is destroying my ability to judge looks.
Something about the fact that I could do coke off her ass cheeks just speaks to me
I have no inclination to even want to think about what God's existential meltdown is going to be like. O.o
I sent a picture of my balls to one of my best friends, so basically it was an average night.
It's such a sad loss when a hot guy finds Jesus and grows a neckbeard
Hey I didn't mean to come across like I was judging you about your liberal sexual choices. I would like details of your threesome if you need to talk about it!
I'm sorry i showed you my boobs.. I probably shouldn't have done that.
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