She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
He made a note in his iPhone tonight so that he would remember that I rejected him.
so when i dont talk to her she talks to herself...idk whats worse
I woke up to her vacumming the grass
I don't fucking care about the convenience of not having freudian slips. I spent 2009-2011 screwing around with 3 different Daniels. 2012 WILL be the dawn of a new day
How about a mike?
Already had two of those
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
My cab driver has a hooker in the front seat. Really, this is serious. And weird.
So we reenacted men's olympic skeet shooting using roman candles and flattened beer cans. That's all
I had a drinkin contest with a person that didnt exsist, fuck withdrawl day
Hold on are you sure that we dont have another roommate?
Yes.
I stole an accordion from the bar
Accidentally
I'm having ragrets about stealing the accordion
There's nothing classy about a pregnant girl at a frat party...remember that.
If there's a nuclear war you can come over. I'll feed you soup and you can rig up car batteries to power the coffee pot and toaster. We can grow tomatoes and chickens.
The first thing he said was that my underwear smelled like Trix but then he looked up at me and whispered "Silly rabbit, vagina is for me."
I would give away three of my own ribs to be able to eat myself out.
...ew
Just because I'm asexual doesn't mean I can't have a revenge fuck.
Randomize
